I am super pissed off with NTU and their download-notes-online scheme. If they want us to print our notes from the net, can they fucking get a better programme?!?! I've been attempting to d/l the notes for the past hour and have failed. It's getting late and I still have to return to hostel far far away later!! Fuck arh..!!

Spoil my good day sia.

Thought I'd blog this in another entry.

These few days been kinda close to Yvonne and Noelle. Like almost everywhere I go, I go with them. Then Yvonne has been telling me lah, that I changed a lot loh.. Like I'm more cheerful now, more crappy, talk more. Asked her if she missed the old me, and she said she likes the current me better. Hmm... wonder if I was like this during my 1st 3 months in CJ. But really lah... in front of friends these days, I'm more outgoing, abit like crazy woman. We told L about my past, how I was like... Even Noelle senses a change in me...

Sometimes... like now... I do wonder if I'll always be the way I am right now. I believe there'll come a time when I quieten down again, juz like after the 1st 3 months in JC. But right now, God has been kind, and I have been lucky. Oh yah... yesterday this gal from CHC called me to say a prayer for me. That was like so sweet...? And J has been really great too... And JF has found a place in hostel to stay! =) Happy for him sia... see his excited face oso... those who know me will know lah... I like seeing innocence from people supposedly older than me... and JF happens to be one of them.. not that I like to suan him or wat lah... he has brought a unique kind of joy into my life..

Quote I thought about while showering today:
Reach for the Skies, so that when you fall, you fall among the Stars.

Nice huh. Wonder where I heard that from.

K lah. Tired le. Till then. Tata n take care everybody... this bloggy getting fewer n fewer chatterbox replies...

Back. Now in Hall 12's computer room. Yeah~ Finally got hold of a computer...

1st 2 days in Uni. No proper lessons yet. Talk about today lah. Morning wake up 7+ then jog to Hall 4 find Huimin. Hehe... den she zai leh immediately wake up wash up den go downstairs talk talk den jog back to hall 12 via some super long slope. Jog until I wanna die. Sianz ah my fitness now kanasai le. =/ But ah... 1st time go jogging with Huimin. Today is the day we did another physically mad thingy eh Huimin? =P (of course nth beats the zoo..but...hahaa)

Hmm computer room's speakers are weird. My blog on my comp but the music like from some computer far far away...=

Ok then reach Hall 12, den Huimin n I talk talk somemore den she go back her hall le. Then I bathe den meet Yvonne n Noelle den go queue for F.I.R. tix. Uni life is interesting man. 1st time queue for concert tix. But ah... sadly din get any tix. So dumb can, we thought we quite near the front le but still not enough tix, and we actually sat there for more than an hour. Hahaa.. still, it was an experience. And hehe... there was the 2 of them to entertain me!

K loh no tix. So go back Yvonne's room. And she taught me abit of the Cyndi Wang's Ai Ni dance! Haha.. so act cute.. but fun acting stupid oso lah. Then next 'highlight' of the day was the "academic counselling" which is just like meeting jc home tutorial grp loh. But ah... hmm.. in my class horh, singaporeans are a minority. Hehehee... but still got to know a couple of people le. Got one even helped me cut queue to buy my notes! Hahaa... uni life is fun sia. Met L again, and his 2 friends. Den I must remember to help Gina get her notes coz she PAID ME for them already! K...

Well Yvonne got into the queue and the queue was like super long.. den we were saying.. 2 days into uni and we've done nothing much but end ourselves up in queues that never seem to get us anything. Yesterday queue for F.I.R. tix never get, today queue F.I.R. tix again never get, then queue for notes oso never get, in the end must pay, n place orders and collect only next Monday. Wah sianz can... luckily we didn't have to queue to collect matric cards coz we were the earlier ones there!

Ate an expensive Western food dinner just now. But really, the food quite good. Then spent the rest of the time in Yvonne's room, watching some Energy's ou3 xiang4 ju4. Mi Jie Le Zhi Wu or something..Then went to wash clothes in laundry room (most are my clothes lah but they did all the washing. hahaa.. er oops..). Then went back her room watch the other episode of the MJLZW. Then I'm here blogging le...

heyo. Using Yvonne's laptop to blog. Hmm... actually got a lot to type one. but ah... maybe if i can get access to the com room's computers den I type bah. These couple of days quite fun lah. Juz kept thinking about some things...

L told me yesterday...that somehow he keeps getting this feeling that I'll leave the group some day... maybe bah... but for now... I'll try to stay with them...

Realised my last post super long... and boring. What to do? Boring hall camp. Bleahz.

Anyway am back home, to get some stuff.. den going back hostel. To check wat time the counselling session with dunno who for dunno wat. Blablabla..sianz. I have still NOT found a single person I know in the same lecture or tutorial group. Sianz...

Today has been quite a fun day. Been all chirpy all day. Getting quite tired now that night has fallen. I wanna get a laptop soon man... den I can blog every night.

Going back to hostel le. tata. take care everyone...

Hall Camp.
Day 1. Nothing much. Play games. Discuss item. Paint flag. Lunch. Telematch. Eunene was there! Funny demo. The slip and fall. Haha. Eunene.=) Dinner. Opening Ceremony. Nice video clips. Eunene emcee! Nice skit. Great dance. Then we learnt the mass dance. Then... INITIATION! Initiation has got to be the highlight. It was fun fun and more fun! Just wish I wasn't really blindfolded so I could see how they did everything. Man they had this long slide, trust fall, spider web, table maze, candle rescue. And we got real smelly and dirty! And they didn't use colgate. Haha. Good! And Eunene was there again! Always feel so happy to see him. Or in the cse during initiation, happy to just hear him! And he saw me all dirty and vulnerable and said "haha keshia, wish u were back at ODAC camp?" Yeah.. I really wished I was back at ODAC camp... At the end, washed up, rest of the group finished the flag, I wrote diary outside my room, sleep.
Bonded a little with one guy. NH. =) Conversations blind-folded were fun. Only way I get to talk to guys.
Day 2. Nothing much. Play games. Discuss item. Paint flag. Haha. No lah. Went Sentosa. Beach Games. I didn't play. Didn't want to play. Den rain. YippiE! Games stopped. Then went to shelter. Played station games. Transport bread using parts of the body. Bleahx. But surprisingly..the group had quite some ideas. Then came the form a circle, sit down, den the entire group must get up together. Not bad. Then came my favourite. But not yet. There was the cross leg den must touch the ear and sianz... I couldn't do it properly. But I got the marks anyway, for my effort for trying so hard despite my fat arms n thighs. =/ Then... my favourite. Haha.. after all the practises during ODAC camp, this one no kick lah. Flexibility test with a stick. And reverse. Then the laughing game. Sianz. Then the eat cracker. Then acting with the egg. And James13 did such an excellent job sia. Ex-CJCians are disgusting. But he was disgustingly brilliant. There is depth behind all the ego in this guy man. Then lunch. Cooked ourselves. Made a mess. I cleaned up. Felt so sad. Everyone dirtied the place but had no intention of making it slightly cleaner. Eunene was sitting in a corner. Gave him a pat on the head. He responded with a "hey!" Just what I needed to keep me going on. =) Washed up. Headed for Palawan. Waited for SP to come get the girls. Sianz. There was a wonderful guy. And there was my supposed SP. Quiet. Good. Handsome. Bad. Bleahx. But he..quite nice. Take drink, wait for me take food. Quite sporting. Then came the games. And I found the Jason from my group and we sat together. Surprisingly we just hit it off really well. The night finally ended. Exchanged gifts. Had to part with my beloved house. Given to someone who will not treasure it. =( I'll make another one. Someday. But he gave me Quality Street toffees. My fav. Somehow can't help feeling that some prettier girl got them instead. During the walk back to the bus, Jason and I started talking about those qian4 bian3 wen4 da2 ti2. Haha.. some fun there. On the bus. Slept. SP beside me. Back in my room. Tired. Halfway through diary entry fell asleep. So yah. Sleep.
Day 3. QET in the morning. I went for Medical Checkup. Returned. Played games. Reflex games. Sianz. Lunch. Then Amazing Race. Had quite a bit of fun with Jason on the train. Qian4 bian3 wen4 da2 ti2 again. 3Js n me. Then the whole group joined in. WL taught me the black sesame white sesame game. Then reached our 1st stop le. Games started off boring. Had to approach couples. Bleahz din do anything. Then go Taka. Had a girl trick our programmer into believing she was in a relationship 4 times. Then shi2 zi4 lu4 kou3. Ate 45 foodstuff. Went Cineleisure. Played DDR. Den go Borders. Find book. Go Lido, find ticket stubs, helped a couple buy food(now that was an experience). Go Suntec. Find balls. Balance balls. Go carrefour.(kenny amazed all of us with his puzzle solving skill.) Find stuff. Go Padang. Kicked slippers. Went Marina. Ate Burger King. Bus back to NTU. Night warfare. Sianz. Found out SP's a jerk. (not that I'm not lah but...) Anyway it was getting quite sucky until I started losing up and tricking Yishan 3 times by pretending to burn my grps strings. Haha. But I got my retribution lah, got kicked by my grp mates. Bleahx. Relac lah. But I shouted my lungs out larh. Shout until no voice. Yeah! Dun care what others think. But that was when I found out that actually... BJ are biased against me(?). Whatever. Anyway, a night to remember. Coz I was seated at the benches writing some stuff when J13 sitting in front of me suddenly turned around wanting to arm wrestle with me. Then I did lah. And... he said I really strong! =) Said so far the one girl he knows that's stronger than me is his ex. Den somehow I let him see my arms lah. Hehe den he praised my triceps leh~ And even asked me to flex when another guy felt my other arm and went like "nothing one leh...". Then I flexed lah den he got quite surprised that I got biceps oso. Then... he said "I never believed that girls can have biceps until I met you." This... is truly a night to remember. My roomie told me to write it down so that whenever I feel down in the dumps, I just have to remember what J13 told me and I won't feel so bad about myself. Well so here it is, whether all of u reading it will get disgusted or not. Coz J13 is really the only guy who's not disgusted by my "thick" arms. I've heard so much shit from every other guy I know (except maybe Andy and Yuda lah) regarding my fat arms, I was getting really discouraged. Thanks J13. You really don't know how much what you said meant to me.. You made my day. After that, went back to my room with roomie. And we had a heart to heart talk. Really. I treasure the night.
Nxt morning. Yeah! Woke up early. Packed my stuff, got ready to head on down to Sentosa to meet the ODAC peeps! Happy only sia. Finally get to leave camp. Went down to Harbour Front, bumped into JJ on the train. Went up, L was there. Then everyone else (except JF) came so we went hawker centre eat breakfast while waiting for JF. And it was during this time that I found out that JJ lives just a block away! As in home. Hee. To think we never met each other before. Then JF came, and he bought watermelon (must mention coz got story, haha, oopss.. k maybe I'll do away with the story coz I promised I won't suan him for a week). So we went down to Siloso beach. And JJ immediately went up the big rock structure. Everyone else were playing ball games, but I didn't want to, and Jo, HL, myself too. JF somehow tagged along. Haha so we joined JJ up on the big rock. And started teasing him coz he can climb up from any side of the rock loh, and just suddenly appear one. Super fast. Haha. Then... Ophians juz gathered in a circle, with Eunene and JJ and we started playing pass the ball via volley. Eunene made it so fun. I dunno how to play one oso enjoying le. Then the small group of us so funny, coz the sand very hot den we dug a patch den each of us stand in our own patch and den when the ball went out of the circle and one person ran off to get it, the others will cover up the patch with hot sand again! Haha.. so fun. K den Jo wanted to buy drinks. Then HL and I wanted to follow. Den L followed too. Then JF came and he tagged along too. So the 5 of us made our way to Palawan Beach via monorail. Then reach 7-11. Bought drinks. And JF suggested we swim to the platform in the sea. So we dumped our stuff into a locker and headed for the seas. And we really had fun there. So much fun, and I appreciated being accepted there, and I treasure it so much, I guess I dun have to write it all down to remember. It'll always be in my heart, in my memory always. JF and L are great guys man. While swimming back, there were these 2 kids aged 6 and 8 and JF and L were concerned about them so they followed them back out to the platform and helped them up before swimming back to join us. So nice right?? K den we got back our stuff from the lockers, and after leaving Siloso for 3-4 hrs, we're finally back there. Hahaa... played more ball. And haiyoh I'm the one who caused the break at 77. sianz. Watever. It had been fun. Then.. Eunene drove us to Bugis, eat at Kiliney Kopitiam. Oh during the trip, HF showed us his JC n ODAC fotos, and his baby fotos too. So nice. Reminds me of my expe days. And I realised that I don't have my Stong fotos! Hmm...=/ K den eat, and heh I was treated like a queen. JF and L kept serving me. Haha. =P Den coz I had to buy sandals, HF, HL, JF and Motorola follow me go buy. Buy le den we went the Adidas see the Salomon products. During the walk, talked to JF quite a bit. Realised that he also has the same feelings as me, that we will keep comparing the camp we go for after ODAC camp. And we all missed Eugene a lot during the camp. Without Eugene around, the camp feels like it's missing something. Even while I'm at hall camp with Eugene around, so long as Eugene's not there, it feels like something's missing...
Back at hall camp. Play games. Sianz. Fright Night. Super funny. Kenny was my buddy. He was so stoned. Haha. But I really very impressed with him larh. He's another really interesting guy. K I wanna apologise to all the seniors who acted in Fright Night. Sorry I wasn't scared. Coz you all were too entertaining. I recognise the effort u all put in ok? Sorry again...
Nxt morning, packed my stuff, headed down to Yishun Safra. Met the ODAC guys for Sportclimbing. JJ taught me belaying, then got me to belay this senior, and I didn't hear him calling so yah when he fell, I flew up too and thanx to JJ who grabbed me back down in time. Haha. Stonation mode is scary. Luckily JJ is sportclimbing otherwise he would have been in stonation mode. Think there's some affinity btwn us sia. His 1st words to me were that I fell asleep den I missed the curb while night cycling, den we bumped into each other at the interchange during the night I left the group for my sign language lesson, den he saved me when I fell during the waterfall trek, den we found out that we stay near each other, den he saved me during sportclimbing again. Anyway then I took a really long time before I finally made it up lah. Thanks to JF who had a really tough time belaying me.  I'm eternally grateful. Great time climbing. Great time with everyone. =)
Then went home le. Not going back to hall camp. Sleep...
Haha.. k I'm late for bbq. Till the next time I get a comp. Tata! Take care everyone!

Someone told me yesterday, that I must call a friend when I see one or the friend will go away. Almost a month ago, it was the birthday of a once close pri sch classmate of mine. He was the one who introduced me to sign language. And I decided to send him a card to wish him a happy birthday, and also to let him know of my change in address. Of course, I also let him know a little of what's going on in my life. Yesterday, I received a card from him in reply! Me am so lucky. =) Got such a nice friend. =) smile smile smile smile smile. =)

Ok that aside. I have gotten really dark. Kinda too dark to still like my skin colour. People look at me and immediately ask me if I do alot of sports. Hmm. =/ Guess I'll be keeping myself out of the sun for a while.

I'll be moving into hostel tonight. School starts tomorrow! So since I haven't got a comp in my room, guess I won't be blogging much unless I can get access to a comp in the com room.

Ok what happened yesterday...(I still haven't got the post on FOOT 04 up yet. it'll come. I promise.)

24 July 2004 Saturday:
Morning went hostel unpack stuff, pasted some odac fotos n stuff on my desk to personalise abit. Then met Yvonne, her parents drove us to MLT building. Went for Engineering Orientation. Was falling asleep. Fiddled with the gloworms in my bag. Heh think I disgusted the girl beside me quite a bit. Oh they gave out Nalgen bottles for free!! And I got a green one!! Wahahaa so happy! Been wanting one for ages.!

After that went back hostel with Yvonne. Then her parents drove me to MRT stn, den took train to Tampines MRT. And there were Siu Fai, Dennis and 2 other ladies. Quite surprised that Siu Fai treated me like friend lidat when he saw me. Hehe. Nice guy. Haha. Vegetarian. K then we were waiting for the kids to come back so we played this word game whereby we had to think of a word related to the Deaf den using the last letter of the word we have to come up with another related word and carry on. So we were playing...n playing... until we ran out of words... then there was this round...when Siu Fai was stuck with the letter 'T'...
Everyone except Siu Fai : Siu Fai treat Crystal Jade (coz if cannot think of word must treat everyone)
Me: Eh.."T"... can use for "Tia Bo(hokkien for cannot hear)"
Siu Fai: Haha.. K loh Tia Bo
WeiShan : Siu Fai use Tia Bo den I start with "O"..."O".."Oh My God"
The Other Lady: "D" for "Damn it"
Me: "T" for "Ta Ma De"
Dennis: "e" ah.. stuck again lah.
Hahaa... the 4 of us there laughed our lungs out. Super funny...
K then finally over le. Managed to help out quite a bit so didn't feel wasted. In fact, it had been fun. Hehe.. get to know the names of some equipment/devices used by the Deaf, got free polo-t. Met a couple of HIs but can't seem to catch what they were signing. Dennis and I juz looked and continued looking lost. Heh...
Then took train down to Boon Lay again. Met J at CHC. Then... cannot blog too much about it. But it was a good experience. Got me thinking about some stuff... coz they mentioned some matters. I've been drifting around too much. Everytime J asks me a question regarding my life, regarding the reasons why I do some things and reasons why I do not do some things, I get stumped. Life has been quite aimless for me. I never did learn much from being a Buddhist, except finding peace within myself whenever I get stressed up. The life's teachings that I learnt came from my teacher during my CJ days... all from the Bible. But I was thinking lah.. that even if I stop being a Buddhist... I'll probby just be a free thinker...tied by no strings... believe only in myself...Still... thanks J, for having me. =)
Then...go home le... and I immediately ploped onto my bed. And had a full 12 hours of sleep. Had a chaotic dream but I remembered nothing of it. Finally not tired anymore...

But I still skipped training today. Oops.

Wah sai. I was feeling sleepy, went to bunk in with my little sis on my elder sis' bed, and I had a nightmare so here I am now wide awake and blogging.

My dad got me a teddy when he went Cambodia~ Buy wine den got 2 free bears, one for me one for my sis. The bear very pretty, very huggable. Hugging it as I type.

Yesterday (friday) went Sportclimbing with NTU ODAC. I self-proclaimed myself off from hall camp. I wasn't gonna go back to camp today, whatever the time they finished climbing. ..

OK time go zzz....

Packing more stuff now to bring to hostel 2mr...

Life has its ups and downs. And it's thanks to these ups and downs that life is more meaningful. Life has gotten a little happy, and a little sad for me.

I've gotten a wonderful room-mate. 2 days into knowing each other and already we can just sit down for a heart to heart talk. And she's a brave girl who will willingly accompany me to the toilet when I need to go...

Sadly, the same can't be said to the many of my hostel mates that I've gotten to know at camp. When you look like me, you can't expect much help from hostel mates. Such is the reality of the ugliness of society.

However, I have been really very lucky, to have 5 amazing people entering my social circle at this point of my life. Hall camp was such a disappointment to me, and when I went out with them yesterday and had a whale of a time, I cried last night after returning back to camp... I missed them all so much. Being in hostel camp made me feel like I was serving a jail sentence.

Alritey. Will be back later.

Back from hall camp. Actually shouldn't be back so early one. But I got sianz of camp. Super sianz. The attitude of the people there really sux. So I also show them my sucky attitude. I BOYCOTTED CAMP!

Feeling a slight sense of accomplishment. Slept 3 hours last night. 12midnight to 3 am, den didn't sleep after that coz making SP's prezzie. And I think it looks pretty nice. Except for the roof, I think it looks great. Just hope that the person receiving it can appreciate such stuff. Too bad my cam's with my dad in Cambodia, otherwise can take photo of it.
Later skipping training again coz hafta move the stuff into hostel. Haai... so messy my elder sis' room now. Must clean it up before I leave home.
Realised I'm really useless. My dad's paying for me to stay hostel, paying for my laptop, paying for everything. During my elder sis' time, she was already providing for herself. And during her uni days, she only bunked in with her friend. I, on the other hand, get to stay in hostel under my own name. Such is reality of favouritism in the family, being the favourite child at home. Haha...sad.
Going for hostel camp tomorrow. So another 5 days cannot see me le. Maybe I'll blog abt my ODAC camp 2nite bah, b4 I go, den got things to keep u guys n gals out there busy while I'm gone.

Recap. Today morning went temple and "fought" with fellow buddhists again. Haai. Getting so exasperated with them... the temptation to convert does get to me sometimes. After that went Bugis to buy more stuff for SP nite prezzie. Decided I've spent enough money on it so didn't buy a box. Think I'll make something out of junk I find in my room. Haha.. too bad for the guy larh.
Then went down to NTU hostel again. Heh my roomie left me a note in reply to mine! Now I know her name and course. Then went for hostel tour. Hall 12 has quite a lot of stuff to look forward to, just that most of them not in my range of interest. Maybe I'll kupo my dad's home darts to play at hostel. But that's it loh. Then the person talk n talk n talk about camp. Phwoar hear her talk about camp and the things we bring... 1st time I going for total luxury camp sia... 10 sets of clothes to change in... then went huimin's hostel. Hall 4 rooms quite nice neh... but there are things I like about my room better. =P Then coz late for capoeira le... so went in, sat in during class. Mestre so happy to see me, gave me a shock. Haai... next month must try to make it for every training le. Must jia you for batizado. Maybe can sneak into NUS to train... heh...
 
2mr moving my backpack into hostel, so maybe bringing lotsa stuff since got my backpack... haai i'll miss my computer...can't wait to get myself a laptop..

Life has gotten a little more interesting. Recently got to know someone. This someone not only shares my passion, my interest, I just found out that I can talk on the phone with him without getting cold hands and feet, even when I'm in the room with the air-conditioner on!
 
Life has gotten a little more optimistic. Take care everyone. To Ger, to Violet, to Huimin. Take care. To my beloved sister, I won't be around much longer to be cold to you. Take care. Don't stress. Eat more. Get fat. But study hard too. You can make it one, so long as you stop thinking you can't. I love you babe.~

Wow. Suddenly blogger has so many text properties. Can change colour at will. Hehe.. so fun.
 
Anyway. Spent the afternoon in school, in my hostel room, cleaning it up. Dreamt about my hostel room the night before actually, but the room in my dream was too nice le larh. My room seemed really nice. It had the kind of study table that I've been wanting all my life. And there's a big soft board in front to pin my notices and stuff. Really like my dream study table, next to the window at that! Hehe... but if my room mate wants that table then I'll let her have it bah, either way I get some privacy. I still don't know who she is.
 
Someone called me on my handphone but my hp was low on batt so I din reply. But when I msged back the person won't reply to my msgs or when I called back later. Hmm... hope it's not from Hall camp.
 
2mr got tour ard hall. Hope it all works out.
 
Long day tomorrow...
 
So much to do.. so little time...
 
I love Gu Dan Bei Ban Qiu. Listening to it over n over n over... heard it while walking with zy in PS and he almost expressed his dislike towards the song when I told him I love the song alot. He kept asking me if there was some reason why I like the song, like if the words carried any meaning or something but I just told him I like because of the way it sounds. Very nice. Hmm wonder what's he so suspicious about. =/
 
Managed to sleep a little later last night.=) Will try to sleep even later...later. Hehe..

Just remembered something. A friend invited me to church. It's to be this Saturday, and I'll be going after training. Thinking about it, I'm quite nervous. Scared actually. I never did like being in a church. Guilty conscience because I don't believe in God? I dunno. Honestly, after being in a Catholic school for 2 years, I've grown to not like being a buddhist, coz on special occasions devoted buddhists always seemed like they're fighting to be blessed. They fight to offer joss sticks, fight to offer donations, fight to enter the temple. Security guards are always needed at temples to circulate human traffic. People need to remind us of pickpockets in our midst. Thieves still steal under the watchful eyes of Buddha?

The spirit in a catholic school however is different. There's peace in their prayers, and joy in their songs. Love is shared among one another. Getting to know people like 3sa, Eleanor and Yvonne, the hymns that they sing always move me.

The last time I went City Harvest I got kinda scared outta my wits. Maybe I should try, and go for the experience, and understand the religion of others, instead of running away from it.

Even if I do not believe in God. Because I feel, that no matter how much you believe in God, ultimately you achieve something because deep down inside, you believed in yourself.

I got my hall keys today! Haha silly me so excited about getting the keys I left the place immediately after getting the keys and didn't even go check out the room so yah 2mr going back again. =/

Ooh..wasn't expecting to get a letterbox too. Hehe.. hope there'll be ppl to write in to me..

Haai.. rule says that we're not allowed to paste posters n stuff onto the walls... hafta part with my darling poster by my bedside le...

Hmm there were 3 of my hall seniors outside the hall office just now, they seemed like really nice ppl. But haai.. i am so NOT a sports n recreational games person, guess i'll be missing out on alot of hall events. But there's still climbing every tues n thurs to look forward to!

Went on a long bus ride again from Boon Lay. Got off at City Hall..went for a little walk from Citylink to Millenia...then walked down to Bras Bersah Sagacity to get my craft materials, den walked down to Army Market to buy my dad his maglite bulbs coz I blew the bulb during camp. Then walked home. So tired.

Lots to do. Dang it I slept too early last night again. 8+ hours of sleep. Can't wait till all the lost sleep is recovered then I can sleep late nights again sia...

I received my SADeaf Membership card!! Hehe.. 1st time received mail in this bag that says "we regret that the enclosed mail item was received damaged during transit through the post".

Oh.. juz received the Spotlight mags through the mail. And sianz I juz spent $4.50 on something that I could have gotten at $3.80 had I shown the guy the vip card. Haiyoh...watever... no wonder zy asked me if I had the vip card. Too bad I usually nvr pay attention to watever he says. oops.. =X

heyo! I'm back at my own computer. Just testing to see if it works...and it's working for now..

Ok people who know how I look like, I'd advise you to skip this entry coz it'll probby leave u with goosebumps and disgust.

Just came home from PS. Went to watch Spiderman 2 with zy. And as he promised, he treated me to the movie. And as expected I didn't enjoy the movie coz I dun like the idea of a spider causing the mutation of some university geek who then became a crime fighting superhero trying to destroy a robotic octopus. But still, zy wanted to watch so watch loh. Free movie of course must watch lah. =/ But here I am feeling quite pleasant larh. Coz start of the day as usual he was being quite an irritant still doing that grab my shoulders from behind to show his affection(but never failing to scare me together -_-"), but after the movie he accompanied me while I went Spotlight to buy some stuff. Then he sent me to the MRT stn larh. Then... haai poor boy asked for hug. Been so long since he last requested for one. To me I was like hugging a bag of bones(?). But it felt so sad. I hug my dad loads and it felt nothing like it. Poor boy didn't know how to hug a girl then, and he still doesn't now. Haai... really wish he'll be able to find a girlfriend soon. There's so much love and care and concern in him that he wishes to shower unto someone yet he doesn't know how to. Haai my dear angel.. how I wish I could make you happy...but what you really wish for is beyond my ability to help u...

Well..at least I won't be seeing him much after today. Coz he'll be trapped in camp until after NDP! Muahahahhaa...! *I'm so evil*

Not a bad day today. Had some time to myself to think about things. Watched a movie with my close friend. Heard some really sweet stuff from him. Hope he finds his happiness soon... =)

To sum up. I slept 11 hours last night! Darn it a whole freaking 11 hours wasted on sleep. Grr.!

Just reached home not too long ago. Went for durians and tau huey after last lesson again! This time only the 3 of us, Dennis, Xiaoli and myself. But so fun~ And like before, I got the treats again. Dennis and Xiaoli paid for everything so all I did was eat and open durians. Haha.~

Yup. Today's my last lesson for Beginners Stage! Next lesson I will be at Intermediate Stage already! Yeah! I passed my BS3 exam! 92.5%!! So happy!!! Of course, cannot forget all the good luck wishes I got from everyone at camp last week. Eugene, Xinyi, Lionel, Joanna...and those whom I missed out. And of course, I couldn't have done it without the one and only James. James u're my life saviour!! Thanks to your last minute revision, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to do so well!!

Haha.. and because I got above 90, ziyang's gonna give me a treat again! =P Said he's gonna treat me to Spiderman 2. Hehe..actually dun wanna watch dat show one, but since he treat, den I watch loh. Bleahx. Hahaa.. poor guy these days forever paying for almost everything I wanna buy. =X

Anyway, today's lesson was super fun. And funny. Started off with the potluck party first. Then there was this girl who made jelly using the orange peel as the mould. Very excellently done, every one of us got tricked into thinking it was just orange until we looked closer. Funniest thing happened when all of us kept urging out instructor to eat the orange and he didn't suspect anything till when he bit into the jelly and froze in surprise that the orange wasn't the orange fruit but orange jelly. Haha.. the scene was comical. Then even funnier, coz our instructor asked the girl how she did it, and she signed to him "dig the orange" and coz the sign for "dig" looks like digging the ground for gardening or some sort, so it looks like she had to dig some super huge orange. Haha.. we all had a good laugh.

Made keychains for Freddie and Jennifer. Hehe.. Freddie signed a whole lot to me when I gave him and signed "thank you for teach(missed out the -ing) me". Said it was very nice, and he was very happy when he knew I passed my BS3 exam. =) Hehe.. I was super happy too!!! He tot I studied some technological stuff but I signed to him that woodworking is my interest.

Ladidadida... I got my Beginner's Stage Certificate!!!

Take care everybardiee... maybe later tonight I'll be awake to blog about camp. Finally...

Ok.. fell asleep just now again. Haiyoh...ever since I came back from camp, been sleeping earlier and earlier.

Continuing from just now. Hmm.. 11 July was Mr Lim's Birthday. So CJ ODAC held a celebration for him at Zhijian's place larh. The place super English sia. And he has a real cute dog! Haha.. but anyway, on Sunday woke up and didn't go for capoeira training coz too tired le. So continued washing up my stuff from where I left the night before, until around 4 lidat, den I started on a letter for Mr Lim, for his birthday present. Then left to go Zhijian's place le. And I left my street directory at home so yarh I got lost quite a while before I finally found the place. And erm.. ok so Siang Peng still doesn't know me. Oh well. But guess it's kinda decided that I'll be joining ODAC too! Hehe.. I wanna climb climb climb..! Oh.. when I gave Mr Lim his "present", he said he wrote something for me on the last day of school but we didn't meet so he still has it with him. Does that mean I hafta go back one day? Anyway, Yvonne and I talked about NTU ODAC larh.. shared with Mr Lim and the others. Found out from Mr Lim that actually we didn't camp on Muntahak. Heh. Oops no.1 error in my letter to Mr Lim. And we went to the waterfalls following Pelepah Kiri. OoooHhhh... Hehe. Then Mr Lim shared with us some of his feelings.. coz Yvonne and myself will be joining NTU ODAC soon mah, and we'll tend to feel the difference between the 2, so we must accept larh. Our JC ODAC teaches us alot more on the intrinsic values during expedition, ie journey matters more than destination, let nature touch us instead of us juz touching nature, respect nature the way we want nature to respect us, knowledge and stuff. Join NTU ODAC den must socialise more le. Yup. I always liked listening to Mr Lim talk. =) So inspirational.

K den us J3s had to leave le. Yvonne n Sophia got on the 1st bus. Then Zebin and Eleanor went back coz dat blur sotong left something behind. So the bus stop left me and Ken Fang larh. Den coz we stay nearby mah, and juz nice got straight bus back. Surprisingly I juz could keep finding things to talk about, and he was pretty nice about it. He oso injured le. Haha the way he said it, like he's so super clumsy den injured himself. But aiyoh can feel the pain. 14 stitches sia. On the arm. Oh and he's in Reccee(?). Same as Joe? Another new post in NS I got to learn about. Hehe.. learning more n more abt NS life, so interesting. Then 2 years later he going to NTU too~ Mechanical Engineering. Heh.

Time really flies. To think 2 years ago I actually hated him quite a bit. But it's because of things like this that makes me appreciate the few conversations we have. Nice guy. Get Well Soon!

My left wrist hurts. Maybe coz just now practise handstand never stretch properly. Sianz..

K lah... shld b sleeping soon. 2mr still muz wake up early make presents for instructors... fell asleep while drawing the template juz now..
Still haven't blog abt camp. But I will.

2mr must go army market buy lightbulb. den.. in the nxt couple of days must go Spotlight buy materials(birds n photoframe) for another birdhouse for hostel camp gift. And mail the hostel camp application form. Yuppiez. And erm... what's presentable beach wear?

Hehe.. k late le. Niteyz!

Heh. Initially very pissed off with my dad coz of his super insensitivity towards my private space, but haha my sister can really work wonders into my mood. I'm lively and cheerful again for a good blog!

Man I really gotta buy Bon Jovi's Crossroads. Falling more n more in love with Living on a Prayer each time I hear it.

Anyway...

This morning woke up ard 8+. Called Huimin tell her go NTU for med. checkup later coz I overslept. Haha. And she overslept too. Hehee.. one thing good abt going out with her. When I oversleep, can depend on her to oversleep too! =P Anyway waited a hell long time larh. Then when finally my turn I have to go down checkup again coz blablabla fucked up reason. Whatever. And you know what. I GAINED WEIGHT!! WTH?!? I crossed the 60kg mark again!! So fucked up sia.. to think a couple of days ago I was happily thinking I lost weight. =| Then I decided. I WANNA QUIT DRINKING BEER FOR GOOD!! The last time I tried to quit alcohol consumption lasted 9 months. So see how long I can last this time. Anyway, after medical checkup, Huimin n I we went down to Jurong Pt for the fastest X-ray in my life. I've taken many X-rays in my 18+ years, from head to shoulders to ankles, and this X-ray guy is probably the nicest and most amusing one in my memory. Haha. After X-ray we went window-shopping! Of course, we went Popular too for me to stock up on my stationery. Then we heard Zhang Shanwei's new songs, Sakura (which sounds really nice) and Dinosaur (which sounds really crappy larh). Kinda like the extremes. Zhang Shanwei da gege ah, think u sing slow songs really nice. Dun gao3 xiao4 le larh. Oohh.. den we stayed in this shop for a really long time. Coz inside got alot of (feminine) clothes, then Huimin was helping me choose larh. But then seriously thinking larh horh, once my hair grows back, and black, I wouldn't dare dress up until lidat oredi larh. It'll be back to just T-shirt n jeans. Yup. Dun waste money. Lalalaaa...Then we go home le.
Huimin rest well yeah? Injured leg not fun wor...limping even more tiring loh... And oh thanks for the necklace and strawberry chocolates! U are so thoughtful!!

Ok.. And have I mentioned? That I got into Hall 12! Sianz. And haha.. guess what. The name of Hall 12's camp is "What the Hell?!". Heh Huimin, can spread the "wat's hell" to Hall 12 sia. Haha..

Haai... my hubby is still sick and has gotten worse.=( Just did an antivirus scan for it and it's infected with 10000+ viruses. And that's only for 1 of the 3 drives in it. So heartache sia... imagine how much it's suffering to store all my beloved stuff. So now I still using my elder sis' computer. Hope Dr Andy comes to fix it soon...

Anyway, gave my 2nd hubby a bath! Hehee... my deuter bag dat went with me on my many expeditions and explorations finally got a shower. Haha coz it really stinks larh. Otherwise I wouldn't haved bathed it. So now it's dripping dry hanging in the toilet.

And...because I bathed my 2nd hubby, I had to find another bag to use later. So I took out my Converse sling and guess what! I found my MD battery which I tot I lost almost a year ago! Ladidadida.. Now can try fixing my MD player le...

K gotta fly. Bubbyez~! Check back 2nite maybe got entries on camp. And Mr Lim's birthday celebration at Zhijian's.

Haiyo. Supposed to go medical check-up at NTU one. But woke up late so afternoon then go. Then waiting waiting in the end fell asleep again. Dreamt of so many of my camp group members but can't seem to remember what happened in the dream. Aiyoh really very tired leh. Rested 2 days le still so tired. Still catching up on lost sleep...

I'M BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I had one HELLUVA FUN time at camp! Omigod even I can't believe it myself. I think about camp, think about what I've been through, think about the people I got to know, the things we did, I dunno whether to laugh or to cry. The joy, the excitement, the elation. Really, there's not enough words to describe everything! And I was so pooped, din even unpack and went STRAIGHT to BED after BRUSHING MY TEETH and BATHING (haha coz I'm quite well known to my group for not brushing my teeth and especially for being a late sleeper).

Yeah had a full 11 hours of dreamless sleep. It was bliss. So now back in front of my computer unpack my smelly backpack. Haha..

Will blog about camp later. Super long entries I suppose so check back for more!

I'm pooped. Just now train weights train until so xin1 ku3. Lie on my sleeping mat nearly drifted into slumberland...

But today's training was great! Not the entire time larh but parts of it. Today's training made me feel one step closer to being a better capoeirista. =)

Me go pack bag. Will continue later. =)

Salve!

So many things...where shall I start...

Dad's pubbing kaki gave him a cd, Metal Marathon. It totally rocks man! Been listening to it over and over since last night. The entire cd has 20-80secs of the greatest classic rock songs merged into 1. Hmm.. 4 actually. Fast rock, hard rock, slow rock and one I dunno wat category one. Hehe. But it's so nice!! I lUrve aLL thE bOn Jovi sOngs!! Then there's this song "Whatever You Want", hehe sounds abit like Country amidst Rock. Real cute. Listening to this beats listening to the sound effects of The Eye yesterday ANYTIME. Hahaa...

Camp's tomorrow, so in order not to scare myself silly at this time, I decided not to watch The Eye. Heck care my father who laffs at me for being a coward. And anyone out there. Haha. =P Can't be helped if I'm scared of ghosts lah.=/

Realised something. I can't pronouce my words properly because of my mother. She has some pronunciation problem too! Haai the woes of it all...

K this is depressing. I went to weigh myself and guess what. I GAINED WEIGHT!! Shoot me larh! I don't exercise and I gain weight. I exercise and I gain even more weight. I should try eating laxatives or something. Maybe it's coz I'm doing weight training? Muscle mass supposed to be heavier than fat mass? But I don't see any muscles developing. Don't feel any muscles developing. 'Cept maybe my back shoulders coz that's the only area aching. But no muscles leh. Only flabs, fat flabs, and more bulging fat flabs. =/

16 days without beer, not even whisky, no alcohol. I din even drink coke. 15 days with my weights. 1/2 the month has gone and I only have 1/2 a month left but I ain't making any progress. Haiyoh.. fated to be a fat blob forever.

Hmm... was supposed to be packing my stuff for the camp. But feeling bored arh. Dun like packing. I tend to overpack. Bring alot of unnecessary things, and not bringing alot of necessary things.

*Shld I bring my sleeveless for casual wear?*
*Shld I wear my new shoes or wear that smelly mud-soaked pair that I hadn't washed since June last yr (my last expedition)?*

Haha... I'm a real lazy person. This camp is not expedition yet I dun feel like packing alot of stuff. ie trackpants. Bleahz. Occupy space add weight and if it's only for at night I might not wear it? I've not been trekking in a waterfalls area before. What I heard from Lek from his Bekelar trek is that there'll be hell lot of mozzies. Watever. Me go ask ard then decide. Haha there's still 2mr. Last min person like me. Heheh.

Things to buy : 1)Wetwipes. 2)Notebook. 3)Munchies!

I think my brain is lagging or something. Didn't realise that I'm going through the aftermath of sore throat that I usually get until yesterday when I started sneezing kinda often. Coz I said before mah, I dun sneeze often one. So when I sneeze I'm probby sick. Thought my sore throat recovered rather fast this time round though. But yeah down with the cold buggy now. Predict this cold to last just a week though. Don't even feel sick. Haha.. =P

Something I thought about during my walk home just now. If I were to list 10 Best Things that happened to me in my Life, from the least greatest to the best, they would be :-
1) Being the Squad NCO of the sec1s 2001 in dhsnpcc(and acknowledged my xiaodi)
2) Staying in CJ despite being able to go to better JC (and of course there's the being forced to drop bio, not allowed to take 4th subject coz no space, ending up in T27 and getting to know Violet)
3) Joining CJODAC(coz that's when my fitness improved by leaps n bounds, realised I had the endurance and mental strength in me, went through an expedition despite a sore throat, no voice, having to communicate to everyone via pen, paper and gestures, and finally because of ODAC, I met an amazing teacher Mr IZ Lim who changed my mindset and made me a more appreciative and optimistic person=)2 thumbs up!
3) Taking up capoeira (actually this must thank ODAC too coz it was in ODAC that I met brada Farhan who introduced me to capoeira)
4) Working at Motorola (getting to know the production at the once existed Line10(datz where I met dear didi), getting to know the QAs, e successful dinner at BREKZ, and of course knowing Robin, XB and HUIMIN!)
5) Being an alcoholic (one step closer to my deathwish, to die from alcoholism. Haha. No larh. Being an alcoholic is an advantage to my dad who used to bring me to pubs often, so I can drink and not get drunk and I can drink along with my dad's friends. heh)
6) My dad introducing me to rock music. (great stress outlet, but also great entertainment)
7) Being a volunteer at KWSH Day Rehab Centre (most memorable is the day I helped auntie Lily in the toilet for her to do her business)
8) Being born ugly coz of my dad's genes and not pretty like my mother (coz only as an ugly girl am I able to understand the cruelty and biasness of society. and maybe find true love bah. but can also understand what my dad went through being outcasted coz he's less good-looking than the guys he hung out with, understand totally his inferior complexity...)
9) Learning Sign Language. (Been wanting to learn it since pri sch. It's more than an interest. More than a passion. More than what mere words can express.)
10) Having the kind of parents I have. The kind of sister I have. Everyone at home, including my aunt, make living worthwhile.

I wanna c my parents happy,
I wanna see my parents sad
I wanna c my parents crazy,
I wanna see them mad
They are always blaming themselves,
Always feeling they haven't done enough
I don't wanna see them living in guilt,
Coz bringing me up is already very tough
I wanna play with them 4ever,
Bully them any time anywhere
Coz whether I love them, hate them, hug or ignore them today
They'll always be the friends who will always be there.

K later blog more. Lalaa..

My computer's back!! Wah the Andy really good leh. Told him to take his time but he still fast fast fix le return me le. I had such a surprise when I saw my CPU back! AaaahhHhhhh *hUgz n kiSSeS my hUbby CPU!!*

Quite an eventful day today. Actually not much. Just that had quite a good training session, even though that brazilian daughter of a minister didn't come. Went on a long walk home from Substation, about an hour bah. Testing my new shoes! Quite nice to walk walk with. Feels so light! Hehee. Then during the long walk, think about a lot of things larh so maybe blog about it later.

Now go clear my room table. Haha so many days in my sister's room, now my room everything covered in dust. Check back for more later!

Just watched today's episode of GundamSeed. Haha my sister and I share the same sentiments exactly. We think Flay is a complete irritant and I wish I could just slap her fucking ass and shut her up. Muahahaa... and we can't wait for Kira to join the coordinators. Heh.

Was telling XB yesterday I wanna buy the 1/144 Freedom model. He still say save money then buy the 1/100 one. Tink I'll stick to 1/144 bah... when I haf the money.

Cyndi's Ai Ni so nice! This song never fails to make me happy on any day I'm feeling down at any time! Another song would be Ou Deyang's Gu Dan Bei Ban Qiu. If I ever find myself a job I'm going to buy Ocean's CD. Heh..

Oh. Yesterday the blood incident from my pimple rite? After that when I wash my face I accidentally brushed at the thread so erm yah it bled quite a bit. Think I'll just cut the thread lah. Irritating & dangerous. Heh.

Hahaahaaa... My mother just called my handphone from the kitchen just to ask me what I want for lunch because she didn't want to walk from the kitchen to my sister's room to find me. Haha. Madness.

If u read my blog after 1am last night you'd haf realised now that some posts are missing. The thing I was so excited about yesterday? Cancelled. Coz I hafta go for capoeira, so I can't make it. It's at 4.30pm. Capoeira ends at 6pm. O well, more time for me to brush up on my training. Since now I'm not training at NUS le. Actually if I'll be staying in the hostel, going down to NUS shldn't be too troublesome actually. See how bah. Haai there's only less than 2 months to Batizado. 1st time I'll be experiencing grading. Alot of thoughts arh. Maybe one day when I have the time I'll sit down and pen my thoughts. Ironic huh. I'm supposed to have lotsa time without a job and now I'm saying I need more time. =|

Ooh... juz remembered. Haha. Thanks kiraku for the get well wishes. heh.


Early this morning interesting webcam conversation. 2nd time ppl share webcam connection. Still looks weird arh. =| Heh.

K... nth le. Prepare for tough training later.

K wanted to blog about this a long long time ago, but kept forgetting. Haha received the letter from NUS that my appeal to BRE has been rejected. And it's obvious that the letter is a standard stencil for all letters coz heheh I didn't state any strengths or interests of mine in my appeal letter and they said something like "...we have considered your strengths and interests stated but...". ...muahahaa... so dumb.

Gave myself one helluva scare just now. Was training with my weights when I suddenly looked at myself in the mirror and saw my left eyebrow covered in blood. So yah my guess was that the part with the thread was bleeding again coz I usually rub quite hard against it whenever I washed my face. But usually it'll juz be some pus mah. Not so much blood. But LUCKILY, when I looked closer, the blood actually came from a burst pimple juz next to the eyebrow so yah the injury's alright. Heh. Silly me scare myself. Lesson to learn : Be prepared for the worst before looking into mirrors. Heh.

Anyway, orientation prep today was quite fun! Unexpectedly. The people in my group quite nice people actually, once we have something to work on together. Huimin there's this girl from TJ doing CS too and she says she knows u. Hehe she also haven't go for the medical check-up yet. Then managed to talk some to everyone in the group. Coz hehe I was one of the main artists for our flag so yeah had lots to do. Me and the TJ girl. Didn't think she's such a nice person to talk to, but she really is! =) Then we kept sharing ideas on how to paint the flag. I had fun~ Then there were these 2 other guys who initially couldn't find anything to do so once they helped cut the cloth for our identities they went off to buy food for everyone. Heh. So nice yarh. But there's this guy that I don't like larh coz have this feeling that he looks down on ugly girls like me. =| Apart from him, everyone else is nice! So paiseh I spilled coke on a girl's jeans, know the butt there. But I got my retribution larh. I ended up sitting on red paint so yarh. Looks quite erm... embarrassing. Luckily my bag quite long and I carry it quite low so can cover all the way home. Hehe. Oooh.. coz at the end of the day there were only me, the TJ girl and this other guy left so we went back together. And guess what! This guy is learning sign language too! Too bad I only found out so late. Overheard him on the phone telling dunno who about sign language and interpretors so I took out my sign language dictionary and (haha) his face immediately lit up and he so excitedly signed "I also" with one hand so I only caught "A-L" but I guessed it means "I also". Haha. So happy. Then on the bus we were talking about joining NTU's WSC coz they work together with SADeaf, organising camps and stuff for the Deaf community. Eugene saw me with the book earlier and suggested that to me too. So well guess that's one place I'm heading for once school starts. Yeah~!

For now.. study study study my sign language text...!

I am fat. FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT!

And I absolutely LOATHE buying myself a swimming costume. Aside from the fact that it's costing me unnecessary money, I get to know how really fat I am having to squeeze into the swimming costume. Maybe it'll be easier if I got myself a bikini instead but a person like me wif big boobs n bulging fats, i won't wear a bikini even if I'm living my last day tomorrow. So yah super embarrassing sia to me and the guy who served me but luckily the guy really very nice and I happened to have very thick skin today. =| Arrrggghhh...!!! This swimming costume better last me a long long time coz I'm so not getting myself another one.

Oh.. 4got this. I think my eyesight's failing sia. Saw so many $60+ pricetags as $50. Luckily I realised before I decided to buy. Must take care of my eyes wor...

Yup. That's part of what I did today. Went shopping alone. In the search of a swimming costume and a pair of running shoes. Got them both at prices that my dad still consider cheap larh so still not so bad. And I didn't even have to go all the way to Queensway. Lalalaaa...

Then came home. And the guy who's fixing my computer's at my place. He become like my mother's friend liao le larh. Watch our tv. Oh.. realised we didn't offer him anything to drink? Even after he spent a seriously long time trying to remove the damaged plug of my monitor from my CPU. Haha so poor thing. Didn't warn him about the plug that I destroyed. Heh. But he very lihai larh. To think we'll be schoolmates in a month's time. Best thing is he blur blur about the NTU admin stuff. Everytime he comes he'll ask me got wat form must submit. Hehee... haiyah but I think sure can one larh. He look like very hardworking kind. Poly going Uni leh dun play play. Wahahaa.. Like advertising for him lidat. Bleahz.

Ladidadida... Oh just now my house the computers all got internet connection probby. Then my mother called the guy again. Then hahaa I had to talk to him on the phone. So farni I sounded like a total idiot(luckily he already knows that I'm a super computer idiot so it didn't sound too weird). Ooohh... then he very lihai. Over the phone can teach me dunno wat press here press there then suddenly the internet working le. Haha.. (oh luckily got my sister so clever know which plug to pull. If I pull arh dun think I can be here blogging now.)

I am so going to get myself enrolled in some computer course during the next vacation.